What’s your story?

Your phone runs on an operating system to drive its functions. When you purchase your device, you never stop to think about the actual system, how it works right? You just want to know you have a device that serves your needs.In a similar way, our operating system runs on our attitude and the story we tell ourselves. It is powered by our thoughts and beliefs as this informs the quality of our operating system. Similar to your phone, you don’t always check in with this system. It plays quietly in the background and you don’t stop to evaluate if this system needs an upgrade. Our phone is least a bit smarter in that it prompts us when it’s time to upgrade the software.I would like to suggest that during this time of lockdown, it is a perfect time for you to upgrade your software. It is your attitude and the story you tell yourself that is going to be a huge contributing factor in how you manage the next few weeks as well as the transition back into ‘normal’ life. Remember your story is based on your beliefs about yourself. Often, these beliefs were formed many years ago and in a different phase of your life. You need to do some serious introspection to see if these beliefs are still serving you.So what is your story?Is it ‘I’m too old to start that hobby, I’m too young to make a difference, I’m an introvert, I’m bad at public speaking, I’m terrible with numbers so I could never do that thing….’ Jim Kwik, a memory expert and author says ‘If you fight for your limitations, you get to keep them because your mind is always eavesdropping’.These stories are limiting you from the life you want to create for yourself. They are limiting you from the goals you want to pursue and even in the simple day to day running of your homes at this point in time.I was teaching an online class on productivity and I suggested that the participants create a morning routine and wake up earlier in order to prioritise their self-care habits. One particular individual replied – ‘well that won’t work for me because I am not a morning person’.That comment was the catalyst for this post. It is her story that is limiting her to thrive in this period of quarantine and isolation. Perhaps that story has served her until now but we are in very different circumstances. It is the conscious decision to change your story that will give you the time you are craving for yourself to make this period a more rewarding and a meaningful experience.If this is your story – what about thinking about the narration differently and the language you use. Change it from ‘I’m not a morning person’ to ‘I am making waking up earlier familiar’. How do you practically change the story? Change the narrative by changing your routine and the behaviours associated with it.Go to bed 30 minutes earlier and set your alarm 15 minutes earlier than normal. The stories your tell yourself are based on the available evidence. So if you change the rituals, patterns and routines you adopt, you will start to produce new evidence. If you can show yourself that waking up 15 minutes earlier isn’t too bad, then you are creating evidence you are the kind of person who takes charge of their life. You are the kind of person who can prioritise self-care and after a few weeks of this new routine – your story will become one of success where you eventually do become a morning person.It doesn’t have to be 5am – if you can wake up even 20 minutes earlier than normal to carve out space for yourself, then you have created new evidence and you internalise that you are no longer the same person.What are you not making progress on because of your story? Where are you limiting your possibilities of what you are capable of during this time because of your story? A great question I learnt from meditation expert and author, Tara Brach is ‘What am I still believing?’ Take a piece of paper and journal about this or sit quietly and meditate on it.Once you are aware of the belief, you have taken back your power. Brene Brown said ‘If we own the story, we get to narrate the ending’. Perhaps it served you then, but it definitely isn’t serving you now. Remember – just because something happened in chapter 4, it doesn’t mean you need to copy and paste it into chapter 20.Change your story. Change your behaviour. Create new evidence. Change your life.Here’s to upgrading the software to the best version of you,Warm wishesLori