The Four Tendencies

In my previous article on habits, I spoke about New York Times Best Selling Author, Gretchen Rubin. She has now developed 'The Four Tendencies' framework. In a nutshell, it distinguishes how people tend to respond to expectations: outer expectations (a deadline, a "request" from a sweetheart) and inner expectations (write a novel in your free time, keep a New Year’s resolution).Your response to expectations may sound slightly obscure, but it turns out to be very, very important. These are the 4 categories:

• Upholders respond readily to outer and inner expectations (I’m an Upholder, 100%)
• Questioners question all expectations; they’ll meet an expectation if they think it makes sense -- essentially, they make all expectations into inner expectations
• Obligers meet outer expectations, but struggle to meet expectations they impose on themselves
• Rebels resist all expectations, outer and inner alike

Knowing our Tendency can help us frame habits in a compelling way. I exercise regularly because it’s on my to-do list; a Questioner rattles off the health benefits of exercise; an Obliger takes a weekly bike ride with a partner; and a Rebel will do it only on their terms and if it suits them.The Four Tendencies can provide valuable guidance to anyone trying to help others change. Most people are Questioners or Obligers, and for a Questioner, an emphasis on reasoning, results, and logic is most persuasive; for Obligers, forms of external accountability are the biggest help. With Rebels, it’s most useful to explain why a certain habit might be desirable, but make no attempt to encourage the Rebel to try it.To find out your tendency - take the quiz here- www.surveygizmo.com/s3/3706759/Gretchen-Rubin-s-Quiz-The-Four-TendenciesHere's to the journey to self-mastery,Warm wishes,Lori