Success Leaves Clues: How to Create Habits That Last.

Starting a new habit can feel like stepping into the unknown.

Rather than feeling like you need to create an entirely new process for this habit, start by examining what habits you are already successful at and following the blueprint.

Success leaves clues.

My success habit is exercise; it is so ingrained into my day and lifestyle. I realise this may ruffle some feathers as it's most people's dreaded habit to start or continue. Yet when it comes to some other habits, I'm making excuses about why I haven't started or persevered.

Here are some success clues to my habit formula; consider what needs to be added or removed to apply these to your next habit:

Schedule it.

My exercise is scheduled into the calendar like any other meeting and treated with the same importance. It is not left to randomness on when I will fit it in. Scheduling it into my calendar is a visible commitment to where that time will be invested.

What do you want to start? Maybe you want to start reading, writing a book, or posting thought leadership pieces on LinkedIn.

"If you talk about it, it's a dream. If you envision it, it's possible. If you schedule it, it's real." – Tony Robbins.

Clarity is key.

I schedule my workout at 5 am and have to be done at 6 am to get the kids ready for school. I don't have disposable time to think about what I should do in that slot. I already know the weekly schedule and what I want to achieve in each slot, so I don't waste time trying to decide.

It's not always about quality but clarity. Maybe I had a disrupted sleep, so my energy isn't at its peak, but I know what needs to happen.

If you're furthering your studies and have blocked out time for preparation, do you know exactly what you want to do in that study slot? It's the same as admin. Does your calendar say admin, but you haven't outlined exactly what? A lack of clarity leads to overwhelm, which leads to procrastination.

Pick anything; it doesn't have to be perfect. Focus on creating progress and momentum; this is where the true motivation lies.

Protect the time.

My exercise time is non-negotiable; it is my block of time over which I have full control.

The most common excuse I hear from clients is that work is really busy and there isn't time. It's always going to be busy, so you have to carve out time for yourself deliberately.

You can schedule twenty minutes for yourself if it's a really busy period. Consider whether you spend that same twenty minutes scrolling social media when you feel stressed throughout the day.

How much better would your headspace be if you kept your promise to yourself and protected your time?

Let go of guilt and embrace your needs by declaring them into the calendar with a designated slot for yourself.

Associate the habit with pleasure.

I love my morning training session. I pair it with an audiobook, a podcast or a course, and I always feel better than when I started, even if I was tired.

If you associate exercise with pain and punishment, you will never start.

If you associate saving with limiting your freedom, you will never commit to it in the long term.

Consider what success habit you do now and what you associate with it.

Equally, what habit do you want to start, and what do you associate with it?

Our core motivator is to avoid pain and seek pleasure; to make the changes you want, you need to change what you associate with the habit in question.

Consistency. Consistency. Consistency.

You don't need time; you need consistency of action because consistency compounds over time.

If you spend an hour working out this week and don't do anything for two weeks and wonder why you haven't seen results, then you have your answer.

Fifteen minutes of something is better than an hour of nothing.

Whatever it is you want to start, show up to it daily or at least regularly.

Woody Allen said 80% of success is showing up. It's the same with you.

When you show up, you're 80% of the way there. Think about it: showing up at the gym is the hardest part. Now, all you have to do is the workout.

Whatever you want to achieve, schedule it and show up to it. Even if you write one paragraph, do one mindful breath, or do one squat, the quantity is irrelevant; showing up consistently builds successful habits.

Embrace boredom.

In Atomic Habits, James Clear talks about how we all can lack motivation, but the difference between being committed and making excuses is showing up despite feelings of boredom.

I love weight training, but it's all about repetition. James says that the reason we get bored with habits is because they stop delighting us. As our habits become ordinary, we start to derail our progress to seek novelty.

"If you only do the work when it's convenient or exciting, then you'll never be consistent enough to achieve remarkable results.

The only way to become excellent is to be endlessly fascinated by doing the same thing over and over. You have to fall in love with boredom."

Knowing you must embrace boredom is one thing, but knowing how to is another. Some ideas:

·       Focus on the outcome and what it will bring you

·       Bring awareness to the habit; if you're doing weight training, put mind to muscle and really focus on what you're doing.

·       Pair it with something interesting like an audiobook, podcast, music or even Netflix.

·       Find significance in making the harder choice to show up.

Integrate your wins.

To make a habit stick, you must make it part of your identity.

You can't just acknowledge the win; you must integrate it. Even if you do five squats or read two pages, celebrate your victory because it's evidence that you are a studious or healthy person.

If you only celebrate the big wins, you won't have the momentum to get you there. It's integrating the wins on the good days, but especially on the days you don't feel like it, but you do it anyway.

You're showing yourself that even if you feel tired or the conditions are not perfect, you can keep the promises you make to yourself. This builds self-trust and confidence, and this is where resilience is born and made.

Challenge yourself.

If one must endure boredom to sustain a habit successfully in the long term, then challenge is the way to keep it interesting.

In weight training, once you hit a plateau and a comfort zone, you must move up to the next level by challenging yourself with higher reps, heavier weights, or harder exercises.

You can intensify the duration and intensity to keep anything interesting.

If you're not into exercise, find a way to constantly challenge yourself so you don't become stagnant in your comfort zone.

Manage your environment.

If you don't manage your environment, your environment will manage you.

How can you set yourself up for success by creating an environment that enables your habit? If you want to start reading, leave a book on your bed.

Your morning routine begins the night before; what can you put in place to set you up for success the next day? Leave out the exercise clothes, prepare the smoothie ingredients, leave the book and the mat out, or the log in credentials for the app.

Another way to manage the environment is to remove what could sabotage your goal. If you want to be healthier, remove the bag of cookies on the kitchen table. Minimise the environment of distraction by closing Outlook and your social media notifications so you can focus on your studies or your journaling and beat the habit of procrastination.

Identify any inner conflicts.

Let's say you want to start a morning exercise routine, but you enjoy weekday drinking, not excessively, but a glass or two of wine.

This is going to make waking up early a challenge because alcohol isn't your friend when it comes to sleeping or giving you the energy you need for an earlier start.

If you associate stopping drinking with pain, such as losing out on connections or fear being called 'boring', then you won't stop.

How do you manage this inner conflict? You must create a new process to trust in order to let go of the old one.

Only when you realise the joy a morning walk gives you and how much better your energy and confidence are will you start to associate drinking with pain.

When you can experience the benefits of your new habit and see it as pleasurable, then you can let go of the wine habit because the feeling of not having your walk is more painful than not having the wine.

Final thoughts.

The golden rule of habit design is to know yourself.

This is the success formula that I have refined over the years.

Perhaps you are not a morning person, so schedule your habit at a time that works for you and your unique schedule and circumstances.

Consider this a buffet; take what works for you and leave the parts that don't resonate.

The beauty of a buffet is that you don't have to commit to an entire dish at once; you can sample a small bite first and then decide.

My invitation is for you to sample some new ideas you haven't tried and see if you can enhance your existing success blueprint.

Building and maintaining successful habits comes down to knowing yourself and being honest with yourself about what you want and why.

When you have a powerful enough why, you can always find the how.

Here's to your success formula,

Warm wishes,

Lori