The Real Reason Why You Procrastinate and What to Do About It.

If you’re a procrastinator, ask yourself what this habit gives you.

You know it’s destructive and causes so much anxiety, so why do you continue to do it? It doesn’t happen to you; procrastination is a habit. It’s a choice to delay an essential task to another time.

A secondary gain is a term in psychology for something you do with a positive intent; in other words, a hidden benefit is attached to the behaviour.

If someone is very busy at work, they know they should exercise when they get home, but instead, they feel stuck procrastinating on going for a walk.

What’s the secondary gain? This person’s job takes so much of their energy and is so demanding that they put off exercise as a way to preserve their energy. The reality is the exercise would give them more energy, but the positive intent behind the avoidance is that they need to reserve every ounce of energy possible.

In times of stress and challenge, common sense is not necessarily common practice.

As a coach, I am also a detective.

When a client tells me their goal is to break the habit of procrastination, there are two reasons I interrogate first. The primary one is about fear – does the work create the fear of not being perfect, judged, or failing?

Or it may be a case of overwhelm and not knowing where to start. Sometimes it could be boredom and not feeling challenged in the task even though it’s well within their ability.

Once these are ruled out, I know one more area is to be explored.

I have discovered that the most common reason people procrastinate is that it provides the benefit of a break and relief from their work day. This may sound strange but ask yourself:

·     Do you take breaks in your day?

·     Do you allow yourself recovery time from work?

·     Do you grind through the day without a lunch break?

·     Do you allow yourself a morning routine where you create space for self-care?

·     Do you give yourself space for creative pursuits or hobbies?

If you’ve answered no to most of these questions, you may be a candidate for procrastination.

Suppose you are not giving yourself space to take mini-recovery sessions like standing up, getting a glass of water or taking a walk outside. In that case, you will create opportunities for recovery even if they sabotage you.

You may disguise the procrastination as research or label yourself a perfectionist, but it’s a desperate desire for a mental and physical break.

If you are putting every person first and not taking time in the morning for yourself, you will sabotage your work commitments as it feels like this is the only way to get a break.

The antidote to procrastination is scheduling me-time.

When you can own the first and last fifteen minutes of the day, you will feel more empowered and in charge of your day. You cannot control what happens during your work day, but the morning is all yours – if you allow yourself the space.

By all means, take an hour – I only suggest fifteen minutes as it feels more palatable if you’re not used to this time for yourself. This is where you create space to journal, get clarity, meditate, exercise, pray or study.

It's a cliché for a reason, but you need to fill your cup first, and then you can give to others with the overflow. When your cup is depleted, you will feel resentful and desperate to get some time for yourself.

How you schedule your day is how you spend your life.

When you look at the week ahead in your calendar, and you only see work commitments, you immediately contract.

There is a feeling of claustrophobia because there is no time for the things that matter to you apart from work.

Replace the habit of putting off work with the habit of starting to put yourself into the calendar. This is where you will begin to make better choices from a place of contentment rather than resentment. When you feel complete, your work becomes a source of passion and contribution rather than an escape.

Here’s to outgrowing the habit of procrastination.

Warm wishes

Lori